人のことを気にしないとか言って、結局一番気にしている。 I worked on this, so I thought I was no longer a people pleaser. But I still caught myself shutting down to avoid annoying others. And I can't let myself just BE cuz I subconsciously believe that people will leave me if I show my downside. But I'm glad that I have this one friend; I'd say she's more like my sis. Thanks to her, I can still believe that there will be some people who will stay w/ me for no reason. I feel safe around her cuz she sees my people-pleasing side, my bitch attitude, and everything, and just embraces all:) Maybe the problem wasn't me. Maybe the problem was this society making us think that every 'bad thing' gotta be fixed, instead of loving them. Love is everything; love isn't just this romantic stuff. Love is taking everything and still being with them; no need to define what's good or bad. We just gotta accept what it is or who they are. And it's so damn hard to find that these days. Thank God that I met her. 自立とかすごい言われてるけど、動物の世界見てみろよって思う。群れで動いとるやん。今はもう1人でも平気だけど、もっとみんなで楽しい気持ちも悲しい気持ちも全部シェアできる環境がいいなって思う。 プライバシーとか大事だけど、家族とか友達の間では全て共有できたらいいよね。 I can't really conclude myself but I guess that's alright.